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Srini

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Published in
Slackjaw

I’m The Chief Mindfulness Officer At A Company That Makes Brass Knuckles

The goal is to achieve that perfect flow state where you’re both present in the moment and perfectly positioned to knock someone’s teeth…

Nov 10, 2024

Two men and a woman in a formal dress are sitting together and meditating

Nov 10, 2024

Pinned

Published in
Jane Austen’s Wastebasket

I’m a Very Mindful Person Who Just Happens to Plot Revenge During Meditation

Finding inner peace through elaborate schemes of karmic justice

Dec 4, 2024

A woman meditates in lotus position on a yoga mat, surrounded by lit candles in a dimly lit living room. Above her floats an Om symbol and two theatrical masks. A red origami fox sits on a side table, with a voodoo doll in her left hand, and a meditation necklace in her right hand.

Dec 4, 2024

Pinned

Published in
The Haven

An Open Letter to All The Clever People Who Clap And Run

I will find you and I will slap you

Jul 3, 2021

An Open Letter to All The Clever People Who Clap And Run

Jul 3, 2021

Pinned

Published in
The Haven

I Know I Cheated on You, But Let’s Get Back Together

You know you are the love of my life

Nov 2, 2021

I Know I Cheated on You, But Let’s Get Back Together

Nov 2, 2021

Pinned

Published in
MuddyUm

How Walking Helps My Writing

Don’t write off walking

Sep 16, 2022

How Walking Helps My Writing

Sep 16, 2022

Published in
MuddyUm

I’ve Been Hired as a Method Actor to Play a Stop Sign and I’m Taking It Very Seriously

Where method acting meets traffic management, nobody yields

Feb 22

A scene featuring a person dressed as a stop sign standing at a pedestrian crossing in a bustling city. A group of people walking across the street look confused, with one asking, “Should we stop or keep going?” in a speech bubble. The urban background includes tall buildings, and cars.

Feb 22

Why I’m Dating Substack (But Still Secretly Stalking My Ex’s Instagram)

Because in 2025, platform monogamy is “so last year”

Jan 17

A humorous meme using the “Distracted Boyfriend” format. The boyfriend, labeled “Me,” is turning to look at another woman, labeled “Substack,” with a pleased expression, while his current partner, labeled “Medium,” looks at him with a shocked and annoyed expression.

Jan 17

Published in
Age of Empathy

The Weight of Perfectionism

Learning grace through shattered porcelain and damaged pride

Jan 9

A coffee stain splashed against white subway tiles, creating a warm sepia explosion with scattered droplets radiating outward.

Jan 9

Published in
Jane Austen’s Wastebasket

An Apology From That Guy Who Brings His Acoustic Guitar to Every Party

Because sometimes silence isn’t actually golden

Jan 7

A modern apartment party scene shows a man playing acoustic guitar while other guests show varying signs of discomfort. The room features brown leather seating, decorative floor lamps, and large windows showing a twilight cityscape. A small round table with champagne and appetizers sits nearby, while partygoers either cover their ears, look away, or attempt polite conversation.

Jan 7

Published in
MuddyUm

Librarian’s Guide to Bargaining With Book-Hoarding Dragons

Professional tips for dealing with your library’s most fiery patron

Jan 2

A dragon wearing glasses sits at a desk in a gothic library, surrounded by books and wearing a name tag ‘Mr. Serif’ while a ‘Print or Perish’ sign and an ‘Out of Order’ fire extinguisher are in the scene.

Jan 2

Srini

Srini

Humor alchemist | Ship broker 🚢✨ For more humor, comics, and philosophy, subscribe to my "Wit & Wisdom with Srini" newsletter: https://srinihere.substack.com/

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