Never Ask a Comedian These Questions
Do you think you’re funny?
Is that a rhetorical question? Would you answer me if I asked you — do you think you’re a bore??
Are you funny?
What is two plus one? What is one plus two? What is one plus one? Who designed the Eiffel Tower? What year did Vincent Van Gogh die? What were the names of Henry VIII’s six wives? You know the answer. Everyone knows the answer.
How can I be funny?
Before I answer that, how about I give you my Swiss bank password? Spoiler Alert? All the money in the world couldn’t make Elon Musk funny. Do you mind if I ask you how to be a bore?
Do you want to tell a joke?
Do YOU want to tell a joke?
Can you tell me a joke now?
Actually, I can tell you two. One — Did you really think I have an account in a Swiss bank? How naïve of you! Two? You are FUNNY!
Who’s your favorite comedian?
Why do you assume I must have one? Also, it’s my bank balance.
